RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS: EFFECTIVE SOLUTIONS
Our worst mental and emotional agony comes from the area of relationships.
(It’s a
statistically proven fact, by the way)
Questions that seemingly have no solution are many:
I know there is something wrong with my relationship, but I just cannot put a finger on i t. Where do I even start trying to make things better?
I'm in a long - term relationship, but my boyfriend is a serial cheater . However, I love him too much and I don't think I can live without him. I want to leave because this relationship is draining me and filling me with trust issues, but I can't.
My husband is depressed after being laid off from his last job. He used to be the one to provide everything in the financial aspect of our household, but now he's turned into a shell of the man he once was. What do I do to help him
I am in a long - term marriage with a man I love. And I believe the feeling was mutual, when it all started. However, he aways makes hurtful remarks, which make me feel like I am falling short as a wife and a mother. I try to do my best and go out of my way to meet his expectations, but every time I fall short, he makes me feel like my job is so much easier compared to him earning a living – and I still cannot do it right. Is there something wrong with me?
Well, these are the types of questions that I specialize in
When we talk about relationships, we end up talking about life in general:finances, feeling confident yourself, career and kid balance --plus the conflicts that arise in the relationship, when this balance is not there... which leads to guilt trips, which lead to increased stress and oftentimes depression... that leads to poor productivity and/or falling behind on your responsibilities at home... which leads to stupid ass comments from the moron you’re with to aggravate it all 10-fold!
As you can see, life and relationships are pretty much inseparable. Your relationships ARE a part of your life – a major part. And this is where Science of success comes in. (My Master’s degree is in Acmeology –the Science of Success.)
Acmeology is a fairly new branch of psychology which deals with the question of what makes some people extremely successful --regardless of their upbringing, financial situation, original life circumstances, etc., while others end up being losers, even though they were born into a rich, functional family, with a lot of resources available to
HERE IS THE LIST OF SOLUTIONS THAT YOU MAY FIND HELPFUL:
RELATIONSHIP X
Relationship X is a dysfunctional dynamic that is becoming rampant today, unfortunately.
The most common symptoms of it are high levels of stress, feeling confused, feeling underappreciated in the relationship and extreme ups and downs and or opposite feelings (hate him vs. cannot live without him). Usually, this is when you feel that there is something wrong, but you cannot put a name on what it is.
Relationship X can also be dangerous: it is the type of relationship that can lead to abuse – and all those extreme cases of when we hear of a seemingly happy family suddenly
In my first Relationship X Counseling Module, I help you diagnose your relationship dynamics (are you in a Relationship X or no) and make a decision if you want to stay or leave.
You can take Relationship X – Module One for the full work-up or start with the Diagnostic Test. Alternately, you can talk to me about your situation on video (Zoom or Teams meeting) or even via chat (if you prefer a more subtle and less demanding in terms of scheduling format). These allow for a group setting (read the description for more detail) – if you need more privacy, you can simply talk or chat with me one-on-one.
If you find that you’re in a Relationship X – this means you literally are dating a vampire. (No, I’m not BSing you – however, in this case we are talking an energy vampire)
After you gain the initial insight, you may decide to stay, leave or wait and see what develops. There are corresponding modules for these situations as well:
Staying in a Relationship X covers both self-protection, safety and the steps you need to take in order to help the man you love shed the vampire spell (figuratively speaking) and become a person you once fell in love with again. (For example, cheating is a symptom of a Relationship X, so this module deals with fixing those situations as well. Yes, it is possible!)
Leaving a relationship should be self-explanatory, however it is not as easy as it seems. By the time we realize we need to leave, there are often complex issues with finances, emotions, kids, public opinions, threats, and so on and so forth, which make the move pretty near impossible. In Leaving a Relationship X module I give a step-by step plan on how to set yourself free, both emotionally and by physically leaving.
And of course, you may not be completely sure which way you want to go at first. This is perfectly normal and acceptable – in this situation you SHOULD give yourself time to think, observe, and make an informed decision. However, the issues that got you to start seeking for a solution still remain: financial problems, feeling trapped and controlled, feeling unappreciated, not being able to sort through your thoughts and feelings, etc. These issues need to be dealt with regardless of whether you’re staying, leaving or just thinking about it. Otherwise you’re liable to drown in them, before any positive moves have a change to materialize. This is what The Issues of Relationship X Module is all about.
NORMAL RELATIONHIPS HAVE THEIR ISSUES TOO
Of course, just because you have an occasional hick-up in your relationship, does not mean you’re in a Relationship X situation. The Dealing with a Normal Relationship module helps you answer questions regarding how to best handle difficult situations when it comes to relationships if you do not test positive for Relationship X dynamics… or do not test at all, because you don’t want to know.
BREAKUP HURTS
And when a relationship ends, it always hurts. Regardless of who initiated the breakup. Even regardless of how stressful the relationship may have been. Up in your mind, you understand perfectly, that you’re better off without him – but down in your heart you hurt – and wonder what is wrong with you, and/or if things could have been different if you did xyz instead. The Healing after a Breakup module will help you resolve your doubts, heal the pain and regain back your original self – the way you were before it all started
SOMETIME YOU JUST NEED TO TALK TO HIM – BUT CANNOT BRING YOURSELF TO DO SO
Sometimes you simply need to talk it out. Communication is the key – we all know it. But what if you’ve been feeling like you need to talk for months – but still can’t bring yourself to open up the conversation? The right time never comes. You’re afraid how he will take it – and that he will take it wrong. Or you simply don’t know how to explain what you’re feeling or wanting.
This is where a good personal mediator comes in handy. (Why should this approach be reserved to political diplomacy settings only?) Not to mention the fact, that we, as people, tend to listen to a third party a lot better as compared to our partner. Use me as your personal diplomat by choosing the Dialog Help Service,