9 New Year Resolutions Worth Considering
Are you ready to be done with 2020? I sure am! There is an old wives’ tale, that a leap year is always evil. I actually think there may be something to it, after this one. But the good news is: 2021 is NOT a leap year. So, there is hope.
Imagine 2021 as a blank sheet of paper. How it will turn out will depend, to a large degree, on what we write on it. Yes, there will be un-expectancies and circumstances beyond our control – but being prepared and wise goes a long way.
It indeed is a good time to make the kind of resolutions that can bring change. This is how I view the task of resolutions: to do what I can to bring positive progress, positive change. Not just something that will keep me from the embarrassment of going uh… uh… uh… when someone asks me at a party what my New Year’s resolution is.
And so – can we come up with something besides quitting smoking or going on a diet?
Consider the following suggestions:
Learn Your Lessons.
I have just come up with this name, as I am writing this article. We can also call it a Reverse Resolution: resolving not to accomplish something next year, but rather to eliminate a negative element.
When I was growing up, this practice was known to me simply as THE New Year resolution. (In fact, it comes from an old Jewish custom, where New Year is celebrated in the fall – but it doesn’t matter. New Year is New Year) This is my favorite way to make New Year resolutions, and I do it faithfully every year. (In the fall.) I feel it has both a cleansing and a self-improvement effect at the same time, and it has, in actuality, helped me get through some pretty tough times and get out of predicaments that seemed to have no solution. So, I am here to bear an eye -witness testimony that this approach definitely works.
What you do: Sit back and think about the past year. What things bother you? Is there anything you wished you did differently? Could some pain have been avoided? Why did bad things happen to you?
Why go there? I believe that everything that happens to us, happens for a reason. If it brings joy, then this was its purpose. If it brings pain, then this is a way of life slapping our hand and thus teaching us a lesson. The better we learn, the more pain we will avoid.
So, identifying the purpose and the lessons behind paid can have a very constructive, healing and protective effect.
So, write the things that you would like to uproot from your life on separate pieces of paper. Put them in your pocket. Then, go to a river, on a roof, on a cliff – and throw them away from you, with the words, “I want XYZ out of my life. I want it to not enter the New Year”.
This year I wrote my negatives on fall leaves, with a permanent marker, and threw them in the actual river. (Because we do not want to pollute the river with paper). The year before, it was actual paper, thrown from a second floor window of my office into a dumpster in the street below. How symbolic. How convenient. This was very satisfying!
Among the things that I wrote were:
- Codependency habit: quit changing my schedules, preferences or choices for other people without a valid reason. (“Codependent habit of changing my energy– I want you out of my life! You are NOT to enter into the New Year!”)
- ADHD productivity buster: avoid situations that are likely to cause distractions. (“Distraction loaded situations – you are not allowed to sneak in next year!”)
-Poor sleep: “Tossing and turning, be gone!”
And so on. (Now, I have done my homework, and have come to a conclusion that, for example, the pain of feeling that I am being taken advantage of comes from my own lack of ability to set boundaries. Do you see how it connects?)
You will be amazed at how well this works. The power of this ritual is almost magical, and very counter-intuitive. For example, how can you prevent future distractions from crossing your path simply by telling them to stay away? This does not make any logical sense, but it works. Try it. My theory is that by saying things like these out loud (For example, “I want distractions out of my life”) programs your subconsciousness to watch out for the related things and issues, before your logical mind is able to detect them. In a similar way, by spotting poor sleep as the root of bad mood and poor productivity, and by telling the insomnia to leave, you are a lot more likely to take mindful steps towards earning how to deal with this problem. Also, coming to the realization of things you want out of your life and actually resolving to not let them back in is also very powerful.
- Start a small online business
I think this resolution is more vital in 2020/2021 crossover than it has ever been. We all have experienced the nasty helpless sensation of feeling unprepared. Feeling out of control, and at the mercy of some decision maker somewhere else. This is one thing owning your business accomplishes: you are not dependent on someone else to tell you how much you are going to make and when you are going to make it. Don’t get me wrong: there is no silver bullet (as I like to preach), and some businesses got hit really hard during the past year as well. But what matters here is the preparedness to adapt. In my opinion, the experience of owning your own business teaches you to think outside the box, to always look for solutions, alternatives and ways around obstacles. This mindset – to always be prepared for the unexpected – can and will arrest despair in its tracks in almost every situation: it is indeed a survival instinct that is very valuable and is worth developing.
Now, online is an important keyword here. Here are the key differences that give you an unfair advantage when you start a business online:
- Unlike most “physical” businesses, it can be started with very little investment: no shop or storefront to rent, virtual employees can be hired at a lot lower cost (starting at $3/hr), inventory can be virtual as well, and so on.
- It allows for most flexibility in terms of time commitment – so, unlike in traditional business cases, you do not have to quit your day job, and can simply add this business to what you are already doing. In fact, this is my preferred way – you should never put all your eggs in one basket, as the saying goes
- And, most importantly – let’s face it: this IS the new normal. The push to shift things towards “virtual” may decrease as the current issues get resolved, but it will never go away, and this transition trend is predicted to grow.
If you want to learn more, you can get started for $65 – and have the luxury of having your personal blueprint and a step-by-step guide on making your dream a reality. All you need as an idea. Actually – just a resolution to get started. More details here*
Lose Weight Naturally
Alright, can’t do without the traditional entries, right? However, just as in the example above, one little keyword makes all the difference. Here, this keyword is “naturally”.
You may have noticed that I did not say “go on a diet”. Personally, I feel that diets are as effective in helping you lose weight as masks are in preventing you-know-what: everyone acts like it is the only sure-fire way to get the results, but in reality, there is a lot of hype, and no go.
There are many programs for natural weight loss: many approaches, many angles. However, there are also many different situations, tastes, preferences and circumstances for the people who want to partake of a weight loss program. This is why, without a solid foundation, it is very difficult to hit something that will work for you, unless you hire a personal coach and get a custom plan that can cost a lot of money. Add to that a lot of wanna-be gurus who want to market their diet under the flag of “natural” – and all you end up is a sea of conflicting information.
So, in terms of advice and recommendation, I can offer you two things here:
- As much as I preach that there is never a one-size-fits-all solution, this particular program comes close. This is indeed a very gentle, non-restrictive approach that everyone can benefit from, regardless of personal challenges and circumstances. And it utilizes all the right holistic principals. It boils down, basically, to balancing your energy – and then simply not eating when you are not hungry. And because your body is in balance, it will simply not crave any more than it actually needs. A very powerful technique that does not take a lot of time, and does not require any drastic changes. You can check it out here*
- In response to the confusion (never knowing which program is legit, which is indeed natural and which one is no different than the rest of the diets, which one is likely to work, etc.) I have created a Holistic Lifestyle Introductory program. This is where I explain the main guiding principles that determine natural success – complete with live lectures, real time discussion, ability to ask your own questions and make your own posts for the rest of the community to connect with. After 2-3 month it will become crystal clear to you how natural things work, why they work, how to tell what will work for you, and how to tell BS from real gems with almost absolute certainty. I can certainly promise that all conflicting facts will actually add up into a clear picture for you, and you will be armed with enough knowledge to make your own informed decision when selecting any weight loss approach.
Holistic Lifestyle is a lot more than losing weight, of course. It encompasses all areas of life (emotional, financial, interpersonal, etc.) Weight loss is just one of the angles that I invite people to specify as form small, interests-based groups, which launch every Monday. So, considering the timing, you can start your New Year’s resolution effectively on Monday after the New Year. A very fitting coincidence. In recognition of this, I am offering this program for a limited time at a symbolic price of $1.99/mo. (Regular price: $65/mo.) Happy New Year. I just want to do my part to help everyone make it a success, for a difference. Access the program here*
What is more – this program will help you accomplish your other resolutions: the ones above, and the rest of the list below. In fact, these are the things I teach in my program – so if you do decide to sing up, make sure to mention them, because the content of each group that I put together is custom, based on the participants questions and interests.
End the fights in your marriage or relationship
Yes, it is possible. About 2 years ago, I realized I was married to a man to had significant psychological damage and suffered from PTSD and NPD. By the time I realized that, however, I was on the edge of divorce: I was exhausted, fed-up, broke (aka financially drained) and felt that the relationship had come to a dead end and had no solution. This is when I ran in into Kim Cooper, who boldly promised that narcissism can be cured, and presented her marriage (and her husband) as an example. By golly, she was right!
Currently, I offer Kim’s books and other materials for this approach in my Relationships bookstore*. If you feel that you are in a relationship with someone who may be having issues with a personality disorder, start with Back From the Looking Glass. But again – more of this in the Holistic Program (this post is getting lengthy already) – just do not forget to mention this in your intake questionnaire.
Buy yourself something nice
This resolution is more difficult to keep than it seems at the first glance. But it is probably the most important one to keep. Somehow, our western culture puts a guilt trip on self-nurture and self-love. This is a very, very erroneous belief.
Again, more discussion on this in my Holistic Program, but briefly: how can you help anyone, if your own recourses are depleted? How can you know the value of a good gesture, of a nice gift, or a peasant moment if you never experience them yourself? Taking care of yourself in love, nurturing yourself and building up your God – given, God – created true self has NOTHING to do with being selfish. You can do all this, and still know and appreciate the value of helping others, and doing the same for them. Or you can deprive yourself of everything and anything, feel bitter, and (with subconscious jealousy) be bitter at all others who seem to enjoy life without deprivation. You see how it can work in reverse. There certainly needs to be a balance (which brings us back to one of the foundational principals of holistic lifestyle – BALANCE)
But for now – buy yourself something nice. This is the quickest and the easiest way to show self-appreciation, elevate mood, and banish negativity.
Here are a few suggestions:
- A nice rug. It brings a touch of affluence to any home interior. Here is a store I discovered that boasts both of quality, a breath-taking selection and way below the market prices: check it out here*
- Natural, luxury skin care. Here is a suggestion*
- A piece of personalized fine jewelry. This is a classic. And this store offers personalization, great selection and great prices. Diamonds are indeed the girl’s best friend! Check it out here!*
- An inflatable paddle boat. I am sure this is not something you are thinking about in the midst of winter, but this is the time when they are selling them cheap. And to me, something like this symbolizes freedom, fun, and good mood. If you were to make a resolution to love yourself this year as it has been suggested above, this purchase would serve as a prefect pledge and will keep you in that mindset until summer. Get 40% off here*
And here are a few suggestions that do not require a lot of explanation or recourses, but are a good start in launching a wholesome, balanced life. (if you need a bit of help in how to accomplish them successfully, planning them out, or just some motivation and encouragement -- and you have joined the Holistic program, just mention this in the intake questionnaire. Again, all these are very easily accomplishable, in case you have any doubt at all)
- Get in touch with your true self
- Do not let your enemies triumph over you: physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. Put up a fight!
- Overcome one bad habit
- One of the famous philosophers once said: “If you want to be happy, then – BE happy”. Read this again. Yes, it is possible. Resolve to BE HAPPY in 2021.
Happy New Year!
*When I give an advice or suggestion, I also feel that I need to provide the tools and/or references to accomplish it. Hence these links: they lead either to my own store or to verified and vetted affiliate partner products that I have personally used or worked with and can recommend with full confidence.